Steer Clear of the Naysayer Trap!

Has anyone ever told you you couldn’t do something?

When you are passionate about a goal or project – It can really be crushing when someone you come to with your excitement shuts you down. Some of us get more motivated when we hear ‘No you can’t’. Some of us will accept others ‘No’s as fact and give up on our dreams.

First, take a look in the mirror.

Do you get too realistic when someone comes to you with their hope? Their optimism? Think about how you react to others dreams, goals and objectives. Imagine them lit up with hope, coming to you for reassurance they CAN chase their dream – do you want to encourage them, or shut it down?

Let’s keep their hope alive – after all, it isn’t truly our place to tell somebody what is or isn’t possible for them.

For example, when I started on my health journey – so many people told me I couldn’t. If I had given up, I wouldn’t be where I am today. I wouldn’t be able to inspire others with my health, fitness and personal journey.

This photo is evidence that you CAN do what you set your mind to – despite others so called ‘advice.’

I was told when I was trying to lose 135 pounds in one year that I couldn’t do it. Here is what I learned– I am now living proof that you can decide what’s possible for you!

Think about the people you rush to with your first idea, goal or big business plan.

Before you take their advice as fact ask yourself this:

1. Do I respect this person’s opinion?
2. Have they ever accomplished a goal similar to what I am considering?
3. Do I want to have a life like theirs?

You wouldn’t want to ask your grandfather, who has never worked for himself, what to do next on your entrepreneurial journey, would you?

Yet, how often do you take advice from those who have never attempted your path?

It takes an exceptional person to look past naysayers and move forward and try to get what they want despite others telling them time and time again that they can’t.

Are you exceptional? I think you are!

Another example for myself, in business, is a time when I said how many homes I wanted to list in 2016 – of course, I was told I couldn’t it.

No matter how many milestones you approach – the naysayers will still try to bring you down if you let them. Recently, I set another health and fitness goal and was told by a doctor – I couldn’t do it. A Doctor.

“He must know better than me,” I assumed, spirits low.

Then, it occurred to me, I had fallen into a naysayer trap! A naysayer trap is the most common trap type used against those with goals. They are effective and easily set by many people in your life. The closer they are to you, the more effective the trap can be. The naysayer trap can be lethal to a persons goal, it’s a horrible trap that takes hope from its victims.  

I’ve been here before and am fortunate to have spotted the trap in time. Keep an eye out for them along your journey to your goal. They aren’t easily escaped but if you want the goal bad enough, it is possible. Once spotted, these ‘traps’ can be fuel to add fire to your journey.

Remember: no one knows what you are capable of except you!

I’ve proven them wrong before. You’ve proven people wrong before. Now do it again, but this time with something much bigger than before. Trust me, the bigger the challenge, the harder you work, the more people that say it can’t be done, the more amazing you will feel when you do it!

What will you tackle in 2019? What has seemed impossible in the past?

If you’ve read this far you deserve to know a secret… When you accomplish the impossible, you give others hope – and nothing is more rewarding than that.

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Jason Farris

Head YES man at FresYes.com

I grew up in Fresno. Relaxed in its calm breezes, listened with my dad to the crack of the bat at little league baseball games when I was a kid and now take my son to do the same at minor league games. I broadened my mind at its schools (I went to high school right here at San Joaquin Memorial, and to college at Fresno State!) I love that if I drive for two hours in one direction, I can be in the mountains. For two hours in another, luxuriating on a California beach. I can enjoy the cosmopolitan atmosphere of San Francisco or Los Angeles, but still be able to come home to relaxation, calm, and quiet.

I love where I live, and I also love what I do. I'm lucky to be able to work in a profession in which I get to build relationships; one that has me meeting new people each and every day and helping them to build new lives in my beloved city. I'm lucky enough to work in a profession in which I can marry cutting-edge technologies and marketing techniques to good, old-fashioned, nose-to-the-grindstone work. I am lucky enough to work in a profession that allows me to work as an advocate for my clients; to use every tool at my disposal to get a job done well for them, and with as little stress and expense as possible.

I love my city. I love my job. One inspires my excellence for the other.

Fresno? I say FresYES

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